Frustrating No

Sometimes the smallest things in life can be the most frustrating. I’ve recently had a situation where because I’ve moved house I haven’t been able to prove my residential address to secure a mortgage for another property I wanted to buy. When every other criteria has been met in the very lengthy process of securing funding you would expect they could wait one week to get official paperwork which they claim they simply cannot manage without. As they’ve been unwilling to make a phone call or accept email evidence, it really does seem as if there is some jumped up jobs-worth trying to make life as hard as possible for everyone. In my book that qualifies as quite a major nuisance but when we are able to see beyond the basics and view everything that happens as happening for a reason we really don’t need to get worked up. There is nothing more valuable than health and there is nothing more likely to damage that than feeling stressed or angry about things that we cannot change. Of course it wasn’t for the want of trying and several dashes to various institutions, frantic phone calls and hectic emails were all to no avail. So it simply wasn’t meant to be this time.

Life however can be full of things that test us and each of these nuisances can be seen as a test of our power and a reason to rejoice not something to wear us down. When we have the right elements in our own identity we can do anything and what we don’t achieve we can shrug off without it affecting the rest of our life. How many people take their work home? How many of us live to work? A shift in attitude of the way we look at everything isn’t nearly as hard as some people would consider. Having a role model can help change any part of who we are by simply deciding to be like someone else rather than ourselves. This came to the fore recently when I had a shift of thinking from something I’d heard and yet when I relayed it to others they didn’t like my persona any more. Then of course we have a dilemma. Do we change ourselves for what we want or do we stay the same because of who we are?

We can’t really be somebody else and if we are happy in our own world then why would we want to change anyway. The real problem is that so many of us want more than we need and just can’t appreciate what we already have. Yet other people can see and value us far more than we can ourselves. The thinking that has brought us to where we are now will not get us to where we want to be. However, if we analyse what we want and why we want it many of us actually find that it’s not what we want at all. Many find it’s not what they want only when they have it, by which time it’s a bit late and they are sorry they wanted it in the first place. None of us want to end up with regrets as we leave this life and in reality the most precious thing after our health is time. The way we use that time is what counts most. Who do we spend that time with and what do we do to use it to our best advantage. It certainly won’t come again no matter how much money we have so thinking about using our time to do the things that make us happiest with the people who make us feel good is a real consideration for our future.

We wouldn’t normally buy something expensive and then not use it but many of us are doing that every day with the most precious things we can have. The western world and eastern philosophies are very different. The happiest people often have the least material wealth. I had an idea planted in my mind that Fiji is the happiest place on Earth so for my winter holiday I’m heading there in December to see if it’s true. I’ve certainly found similar facts in other more spiritually based places so I have no doubt that this experience will be no different. As I walked through London this morning I noticed the homeless feeling positive that things would improve and the wealthy feeling negative that things would get worse. It’s a strange life when we can’t appreciate that we live in one of the wealthiest nations on Earth and gripe about the trivial things that frustrate us. I for one want to sing with joy for all the things that have come my way whether at the time they appear good or bad.

One of the seven seeds of the fulfilment of life is belief and understanding, certainty in what we have is what was meant to be so that we don’t feel frustrated by not getting something we thought we would. Far better in many ways to give away most of our chattels so we have a minimal existence with fewer goods to bother us. Anything we have that would upset us to lose may not be worth having in the first place if it is a physical object especially if we only want to blame someone else for us not having it.As the famous words say “to him who has much shall he have more” but if he doesn’t appreciate the small things he’ll lose more in the end. The true value of wealth is not in what we have, it’s in not wanting more. My de-cluttering has already started.

Endeavour to be grateful for everything and not frustrated with anything.


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