Today is the birthday of the woman I passionately admire, love and adore and so this blog was written last weekend as today will be a play day doing anything and hopefully everything that my beloved wants. Finding a gift to show my feelings is quite another matter! There was a time when I considered gifts recognition of remembering a date and had the idea that anything personal that raised a smile or created a feeling of connection was sufficient to show that I had made an effort. Now however, I face a dilemma of feeling such powerful emotion for this particular woman that I cannot find, think of or even afford to buy any present that would befit her beauty. When we give our heart to another we give of ourselves in such a manner as to be forever self-critical, feeling we are not good enough or lacking in some way because we hold the other in such high esteem. The more we love ourselves the more we can love another so my lack of inclination to find a fitting present isn’t because of poor thinking it’s because I don’t feel anything is good enough to show my feelings. Spending one pound or a hundred thousand pounds won’t make any difference to the outcome if I don’t feel the gift suitably conveys my feelings.
Whenever we give something to anyone we can either give something we like, something we don’t like or something we think the other person will like. When we give praise or thanks or just friendliness to someone who doesn’t normally receive it, we give more than just the gesture as we give respect of what they have done or are doing. There is a saying that says ‘You can tell the true character of a man by the way he treats those that do not serve him’. Everyone is equal in the eyes of those who appreciate everything but showing gratitude to another who has brought great joy to a sad heart is a difficult task. Whilst we should live a life of gratitude it is sometimes hard to realise that everything we receive is the best we will ever have as it is on top of what we already have. The old regime of saying Grace before eating, should have helped many of us older people to understand that each meal is another meal we are able to consume so it must therefore be the best meal we will ever consume. That’s providing we don’t drop dead at the table of course! The ability to manifest whatever we want must be based on the same principles of appreciation and gratitude before we have it and of what is to come.Hearing of some peoples recent gifts and the lack of thought around them makes me want to get it right all the more. I can’t read minds so I have to rely on intuition and instinct to tell me what I want to give. Often there are clues in conversations as to what people need but that isn’t necessarily the same as what you want to give them to show your appreciation.
Yesterday I received a card with a smiley face thanking me for attending a meeting. That one simple gesture made an otherwise hard working mixed up day into something that made me feel elated by my effort. So often it’s not what we give but when and with what sentiment that makes it worthwhile. Last week I had an afternoon at a Polo match with royalty and celebrities but as it was a PR exercise for a car company I didn’t really appreciate the huge expense that had been spent on every person there and yet in terms of a gift it was very generous. The appropriate gift for one person receiving it isn’t necessarily the same as the intention with which it may be given. Many families will only now be paying off what they spent at Christmas as they thought their loved ones needed more than they could reasonably afford to give, that’s because society has conditioned people to expect and want to give material goods instead of simple pleasures. I have no doubt that few children will still be enjoying the expensive toys their parents struggled to buy them less than half a year ago. For many there can be no better gift than giving time. Time to help them do what is hard for them, time to help them understand that they have support, time to help them find their passion, purpose or value.
There are times when we give too much and aren’t valued for our efforts. There are times when we don’t give enough and aren’t able to receive anything in return, and there are times when we can strike a happy medium and give with willingness and receive with gratitude. Whenever we recognise that we have been foolish in giving we have to reassess our position with those around us. By understanding the mistakes we make we can help ourselves and others to achieve more through the simple things they do in everyday life. Valuing what we have and what we want is paramount in understanding why we do what we do and why we get what we have. When we give thanks to show gratitudein recognition and appreciation of what we are about to receive being the best, we can’t help getting more of what we want. Greed, sloth and jealousy are the mortal sins of a large part of the Western World or so it seems. Give more to help overcome the little problems within ourselves and more of the big ones in the world might follow.
Endeavour to take action to give more if you want to receive more.
Lionel Palatine – He is a regular networker and speaks at events as well as being a property author and adviser. He joint ventures deals and shows people how to buy properties for low cost inclusive of all fees and deposits.